I know I will never forget all of these things.  And I am the loved one. My wife is the one living with this, as are countless others.  Finding out Nicky’s diagnosis was cancer was and still is very numbing.  Your mind becomes a paradox sometimes.  I know I am still in denial.  It’s there but being brave means you push through it so you still live.

Knowing what is going on can be frustrating.  There is no blame to place in our minds.  The worry and concern of yesterday and what may have happened seems irrelavant to us.  Much like knowing what is ahead. There can only be positive.  Positive and more plans. Plans for life and happiness!

Honestly, that paradox, there is only one way out. You have to move forward and wonder and dream and hope.  All mixed up together but that’s what you have to do. We all do it everyday. We all choose where to put our aspirations. Where we look for motivation.  How we respond when life just kicks you right in the butt and yes deal with it.

I love my wife. For my part right now, I wanna hold her hand and walk with her together. Each day is another chance to make moments in to memories. Be thankful for our friends and our families for all of the support they give us.

Different things happen for different reasons, and different people come into our lives with meaning. We believe in that.  We do look for the positive in all things and the news of cancer just makes you do that all the more.  There is balance in life, always some good with the bad and some bad with the good.  Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t continue to look for as much of the good as you can.

Nicky and I were having fun before she got sick. I don’t know if we were doing everything the right way or the wrong way but we were most definitely doing our way together.  That was the plan along and that hasn’t changed.  We still want to do all the things most of us do.  Travel and enjoy life a little.  Our sites on our another cruise. That is a wonderful feeling.

There is no doubt this site is an outlet for me. I know Nicky enjoys a little bit of attention and so she should. She really is an amazing woman.

The world is full of amazing people doing amazing things every single day.  We just don’t see all of the miracles of what life is really all about on all the TV shows.  There are battles happening everyday.  And there are victories, reasons to celebrate, reasons to continue.  If we can shed a little bit of light on all that, gotta be meant to be for some good. Make somebody else smile maybe.  That would make us smile. Strive to be happy no matter what the news may be sometimes.

Thanks for reading.

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